The market’s too hard. I’m not interesting enough. I’m awkward on camera. I don’t have the right equipment. Everyone I know already has an agent.
We’ve heard aaaalll these excuses, and in this episode (part 2 of The Wealthy Agent Upgrade series), we’re tackling them together.
So grab your favorite beverage and tune in for the reframes you need to start thinking and operating like the WEALTHY go-to agent you’re meant to be — yes, we go into what “wealthy” truly means and how you get to define it.
What Your Business Looks Like is a Product of Your Thinking
Albert Einstein once said, “The world we have created is a process of our thinking. It cannot be changed without changing our thinking.”
Our businesses also reflect our thinking, which, if you ask us, is a good thing. We created businesses based on our thinking, so if we change our thinking, we can also change our businesses!
This whole series is about stepping into the identity of someone who takes full ownership of her results. As modern agents, we’re not blaming the market, waiting for the perfect conditions, or doing what everyone else is doing, wondering why nothing’s changing.
Have you ever heard of herd mentality? As humans, we have a tendency to gravitate toward what feels familiar, which often means what everyone else is doing, all because it feels like the safest option.
In real estate, that looks like posting market updates, sharing your listings, putting your broker’s info on everything, matching your brand colors to your brokerage, cold calling your sphere, hosting open houses, or asking everyone you know if they’re looking to buy or sell.
Instead of operating at whatever the industry norm is telling you to do, ask yourself: what makes sense for the life and business I’m trying to build? What’s going to work for me?
Imagine a hundred gray icons all moving in the same direction, and then one bright, neon pink icon is among them, moving a different way. Which icon do you remember? The pink one, obviously!
That’s what personal branding is. If the whole goal of marketing is to stay top of mind so you get more repeat clients and referrals, you have to be willing to stand out, aka to be remembered for something beyond the fact that you sell real estate.
And you can be in complete control of that!
Limiting Beliefs That Are Holding Real Estate Agents Back
This is the heart of the episode. We went through the most common beliefs we hear from agents every single day and the modern agent reframes to replace them:
“Everyone I know already has an agent.” The reframe: Relationships are what win, and I know how to build those. Only 28% of people use the same agent twice, which means the people in your sphere are not locked in. What locks them in to you is the relationship you build with them now, before they need you.
“I’m not interesting enough to build a personal brand.” The reframe: My normal life is exactly what makes me memorable. A personal brand is composed of small, relatable, everyday moments that make someone think me too or where’d you get that? (And if you need more convincing on this one, go back and listen to Episode 4.)
“The market is too hard. Interest rates are too high.” The reframe: Every market creates opportunity, and I can adapt. When buyer agency agreements shook the industry, a lot of agents walked away. The ones who stayed figured it out and moved on. Every hard market is just a filter — it weeds out the agents who don’t believe in their own value, which brings us to the next one…
“I’m just awkward on camera.” The reframe: My visibility matters more than my comfort, and discomfort is temporary. The truth is that everyone feels awkward on camera. We’ve been doing this for years and still re-record reels. But you build confidence over time, and more importantly, you build grace. You stop needing it to be perfect, and you just start showing up. Your imperfect, real, unfiltered version is what people want to watch!
“I don’t have the right equipment.” The reframe: I have everything I need in my hand right now. Your phone is your studio. The agents waiting for better lighting or a nicer camera are going to keep waiting, while the agents with zero excuses keep showing up and getting the business.
“Being a mom/having kids is a distraction.” The reframe: Being a mom is making me a better, more resilient business owner. Having kids forces you to be efficient, creative, and adaptable, all skills that make you better at running your business.
“I don’t want to bother my sphere.” The reframe: The disservice is not showing up, not showing up too much. The people on your email list opted in. They raised their hand and said they want to hear from you. If you feel like you’re bothering them, it’s probably because you’re not confident in what you’re sending. But when your content sounds like a letter to a friend, it doesn’t feel like that at all. While you’re scared to show up, someone else is out there praying for an agent exactly like you. Don’t let them find someone else first!
“I need everything to be perfect before I post.” The reframe: My most powerful post is on the other side of just hitting publish right now. Perfection is killing your momentum. Kayla started adding estimated time stamps to prompts inside Modern Agent Social Club, and agents were shocked — they realized they were spending over an hour on a carousel that should take ten minutes. That’s Parkinson’s Law at work: work expands to fill the time you give it. Set a timer, get it done, and hit post. Your brand isn’t built on one perfect graphic but on how you consistently make people feel over time.
“I have to do everything myself / I can’t afford support.” The reframe: Staying stuck is always more expensive than investing in the thing that moves you forward. The mental clutter of doing everything yourself — every admin task, every little thing that isn’t in your zone of genius — costs you more than money. It costs you focus, creativity, and energy. Outsourcing even one thing frees up your brain to work on the things that actually grow your business.
Why Your Beliefs About Wealth Might Be the Problem
When Chelsea was in real estate and thought about what it meant to be a top producer, every image she had looked like someone who worked every weekend, chased cold leads, answered their phone 24/7, and had no life. So unconsciously, she didn’t want it. Because who would?
But that image was shaped by her experiences and observations, not by reality, and it was keeping her from even wanting to grow.
The Naked Mind by Annie Grace talks about how beliefs aren’t something we form consciously. They live below the surface, built from our conclusions, assumptions, experiences, and observations. Most of what’s shaping your reality right now, you’re not even trying to think. It’s just running in the background.
So if your belief about being a successful agent looks like burnout, no boundaries, and a life you don’t want — that belief is quietly keeping you from pursuing the business you actually could have. The truth is, you can be a top-producing agent and have time for your life because you get to define what that looks like. There is no one default setting for success.
And “wealthy” doesn’t just mean a number in your bank account. It means the life you’re living. The boundaries you hold. The clients you love working with. The business that runs on referrals instead of cold leads.
You get to define it!
You Cannot Be Afraid of Change
Chelsea shared this quote: “You may feel very secure in the pond that you are in, but if you never venture out of it, you will never know that there is such a thing as an ocean or a sea.”
If you’re comfortable in your pond — your current results, habits, and beliefs — that’s fine. But you might not even know what’s possible beyond it. The ocean exists. You just have to be willing to swim toward it.
James Clear puts it this way: “The most effective way to change your habits is to focus not on what you want to achieve, but on who you wish to become.”
So who do you want to become? The agent who gets referrals without chasing leads? The agent who’s deeply rooted in her community? The agent who has a full pipeline and still makes it to soccer practice? Focus on becoming her. The habits and results follow naturally from there.
And as Kayla put it — we grow toward whatever we expose ourselves to. Like a plant leaning toward the light, where your attention goes, growth follows. So what are you feeding? What story are you watering every day?
Do You Want the Excuses or the Results?
Because you can’t have both.
There are plenty of excuses available. The market, the kids, the equipment, the time, the awkwardness — every single one is available to you if you want it. But the excuses and the results don’t coexist. You have to pick one.
And this isn’t just for the agent who’s brand new and hasn’t sold a house yet. Chelsea got a message from a listener who sells $15 million a year and is still asking herself — how do I go deeper in my community? How do I become more known?
There is no finish line or version of success where you stop growing.
So wherever you are — brand new, mid-career, or selling $15M a year — the wealthy agent upgrade is available to you. It starts with deciding today that you’re going to think differently.
Henry Ford said it best: “Whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right.”
Your brain will spend all its energy looking for confirmation of whatever story you’re telling it. So start telling it a better one.
Your Homework: Morning Pages and the Belief Journal
Before next week, we have two assignments for you.
1. Journal your limiting beliefs. Write down any of the beliefs from this episode that hit a little too close to home. Then go deeper — why have you been telling yourself that story? And what’s the reframe you’re going to replace it with? Write the reframe on a sticky note and put it somewhere you’ll see it every single day.
2. Try Morning Pages. This comes from Julia Cameron’s book The Artist’s Way. Every morning, before you do anything else, write three pages of longhand, stream-of-consciousness thoughts. Chelsea just started doing this and said it feels incredibly freeing — like finally clearing the mental clutter so you can actually focus on what matters. Light a candle, pour your coffee, and write.
Next week, the series gets tactical. We’re moving from mindset into the actual actions you should be taking. But the mindset has to come first — it’s the foundation everything else is built on. See you there!
This episode was edited by Adrienne Cruz.
