You’re posting twice a day. You’re at every networking event. You bought three different templates this month. You’re following five different marketing gurus. And somehow… you’re still not getting the results you want.

In this first episode of The Wealthy Agent Upgrade series, Chelsea and Kayla are calling out the one thing that’s quietly draining your time, your energy, and your bank account faster than any business expense ever could — distraction.

Do you feel like you’re working your tail off but not getting anywhere? You’re probably distracted. Let’s talk about how to refocus!

The Most Expensive Cost in Your Real Estate Business

The most expensive thing in your business isn’t your MLS dues, your Zillow subscription, or that course you bought last month.

It’s distraction.

It costs you time, focus, energy, and your ability to stick with something long enough to actually see results.

Think about it. How much time have you spent in real estate Facebook groups looking for the magic lead source? How many hours have you wasted screenshotting every content idea you see on Instagram, only to never use any of them? How many networking events have you dragged yourself to, hoping this one would be different?

You can’t build a wealthy business with distracted energy.

When you hear “self-sabotage,” you probably think about negative self-talk or looking in the mirror and picking yourself apart. But self-sabotage shows up in way more places than that.

Chelsea shared the definition she found: “Self-sabotaging behavior refers to actions or thought patterns that consciously or subconsciously interfere with one’s long-term goals and overall well-being.”

So when you wake up every day telling yourself, “I’m never going to be as successful as her” or “I’m just not organized enough,” that’s self-sabotage.

When you keep saying you want to grow your business but then eat the donut, buy the thing, chase the shiny object (aka, you get distracted) — that’s self-sabotage too.

Here’s a quote from the book Chelsea’s been reading, The Mountain Is You: “Your new life is going to cost you your old one. It’s going to cost you your comfort zone and your sense of direction.”

If you’re somewhere in your business that you don’t want to be, something’s gotta change, and we think the #1 place you should look is your focus.

The Realtor Networking Event Trap

One of the biggest distractions agents fall into is realtor-to-realtor networking events.

If you live in a market where everyone’s moving to, and referrals are flying left and right, maybe these events work for you. But for most agents, they’re a giant waste of time.

Kayla, for example, lives in a small town in Indiana. The chances of her getting a referral from an agent in Texas because she flew out to a networking event are pretty slim. And even if she did get one referral, was it worth the time away from her family, her clients, and her actual business?

Her bottom line as an agent was to sell houses to her sphere so she could spend more time with her family. A realtor networking event didn’t connect to that at all.

This isn’t just an agent thing, by the way. Chelsea doesn’t speak on stages or travel for work events either because it doesn’t align with her bottom line. She’s not willing to leave her family, and she’s built a multiple seven-figure business without doing any of that.

When you’re confident in what you want, saying no to things becomes so much easier.

The Marketing GPS Analogy

When you use a GPS, you have to put in one destination. If you keep changing the destination, it keeps recalculating. Over and over and over.

That’s exactly what happens when you keep jumping from strategy to strategy, person to person, idea to idea. You’re constantly rerouting yourself, and you never actually get anywhere.

Chelsea pointed out that when you put a destination in your GPS, it gives you three routes. You can take the lake route, the highway, or the one with tolls. But you can’t take all three at once because you’d never arrive.

The same goes for your marketing. Pick one route. Pick one person to follow. Pick one strategy and commit to it long enough to see if it actually works.

Remember: Instagram’s entire goal is to keep you on the app. They want you distracted. They want you seeing new trends, ideas, and things to screenshot. But they also want you to show up consistently.

Adam Mosseri (head of Instagram) literally said you’re not going to be rewarded for posting five times a day. You just need to pick something you can sustain and be consistent with it.

Why “Being Busy” Is Actually Making You Broke

Raise your hand if you’ve ever had one of those days where you have 10 places to be. You’re popping into one graduation party, then rushing to another, then a dinner, then whatever else. You’re never actually present anywhere.

That’s what it feels like when you’re trying to do all the things in your business. You’re posting here, networking there, trying this lead source, testing that strategy… You’re never settling in long enough to actually build a relationship or see results.

Here’s a quote from Tools of Titans that Kayla shared: “Once you reach a decent level of professional success, a lack of opportunity won’t kill you. It’s drowning in the ‘that would be kind of cool’ commitments that will sink the ship.”

We make ourselves really busy with things that don’t actually matter. We spend so much time rearranging the logs on the fire, but we never light it. People are going to leave your campfire circle if there’s no warmth. But if you can just get that spark going and let the logs be for a minute, you’ll create something people actually want to be around.

How to Know If Something’s a Distraction

If you’re using the word “should,” there’s a good chance it’s a distraction.

“I should do a booth at this event.” “I should start teaching other agents.” “I should try door knocking.” “I should post on TikTok too.”

Should, should, should.

Here’s the question you need to ask instead: Does this solve the problem of what’s wrong?

If what’s wrong is that you’re not getting enough referrals from your sphere, will a booth at a wedding expo solve that? Probably not.

If what’s wrong is that you want consistent business without paying for cold leads, will jumping on every new trend solve that? Nope.

Chelsea put it this way: “When that shiny thing comes up, ask yourself — does that solve the problem of what’s wrong? Will this solve the problem? Is it something I can keep doing?”

If the answer is “I don’t know” or “probably not,” forget it. Keep doing the bigger things that will actually get you where you want to go.

What Wealthy Agents Do Differently

The difference between agents who are barely staying afloat and agents who are actually building wealth is that wealthy agents think long-term.

They’re not thinking “where can I get my next client?” They’re thinking “where can I get my next 30?”

And that completely changes how you show up.

Chelsea made this point about thinking long-term versus short-term: “If you had to answer the question of how can I sell 30 houses versus how can I sell one, your answers are gonna be so different.”

When you think about selling one house, you’re in survival mode. You’re looking for the quick win.

But when you think about selling 30 houses, you start thinking about systems and relationships, about building something that actually lasts.

Wealthy people think in years, not weeks. They’re playing the long game.

The One Question to Ask Before Saying Yes to Anything

Before you say yes to that networking event, that booth, that new strategy, that course, that whatever — ask yourself this:

Does this align with my personal brand?

Chelsea broke this down with a great example. If you have “mom life” as part of your brand and you connect with other local moms, then doing a booth at your kid’s school makes total sense. You’re already there. You’re already connecting with these people, and it aligns.

But doing a booth at a wedding expo makes zero sense for you.

On the flip side, if you don’t have kids yet, you were in a sorority, and you love event planning, a wedding expo could actually be a great fit. You can relate to these people and build real connections.

The point is that everything you do should tie back to your personal brand. If it doesn’t, it’s probably a distraction that’s resetting your momentum.

Every time you do something that doesn’t align with the destination you’re trying to get to, it takes you on a detour. It costs you time and energy that could’ve been spent actually building the business you want.

Your Homework: Define What Wealth Actually Means to You

Here’s your homework for this week, and we want you to actually do this. Like, pause the podcast, open your Notes app, and write this down.

What does wealth mean to you?

Not just the number in your bank account. What does it actually look like?

Does it mean traveling more with your family? Does it mean having fewer clients but better ones? Does it mean having your weekends free? Does it mean being able to pay for your grandkids’ college someday?

Write it down, and get specific.

Then ask yourself: What business do I want one year from now?

Don’t play small. If you answered in your head, double it.

Now here’s the real work: Eliminate everything that doesn’t support that.

If you don’t want to be chasing cold leads a year from now, stop doing the things that keep you in that cycle. If you don’t want to be doing random tactics hoping one of them works, stop spreading yourself thin.

Pick one thing, and go all in.

Kayla also suggested doing a time audit. Look at how you’re actually spending your time. How much of it is busy work versus needle-moving work? How much of it is tinkering with things that don’t matter versus doing the uncomfortable but important stuff?

And here’s one more exercise for good measure: If you were on this podcast right now and we asked you to name one thing you’re going to eliminate, what would it be?

Write that down on a sticky note. That’s the thing you need to let go of.

Stop playing small. Stop getting distracted. And start building the business you actually want.

Because the only person who can do this for you is you!

This episode was edited by Adrienne Cruz.